Eight Moms Share Tips for #WFHWK

Worlds collided in a BIG way with the COVID-19 crisis for working moms (and dads)! Things are “turning turtle,” as Topsy, (Meryl Streep’s character) sang in Mary Poppins Returns.

“Turning turtle? What exactly does that mean?
It means my whole world goes flippity flop like a turtle on its back. And I don’t know my up from my down, my east from my west, my topsy from my bottomsy.”

Can you relate?

Work, daycare, school and home life are all intersecting more than ever. Remote work plus ALL THE THINGS has us working more hours. 40% more.

Americans, in particular, are working three more hours per day, on average, according to new research from NordVPN Teams (detailed in Lucy Meakin’s Bloomberg article).

What are parents to do? Young children need care. Work needs to be done.

So I crowdsourced advice from eight high-achieving women who are tasked to manage it all.

From paper plates and Bluetooth headphones to grace over perfection, soak in fellow mama wisdom and stand in solidarity in the struggle as we all figure it out together.

*Photo by* *Andrea Piacquadio* *from* *Pexels*

THE THREE P’s

Things are absolutely bizarre right now with my husband and I working from home with a 5-year-old and a 7-month-old. We are doing the best we can, but the bar for just about everything is set a bit lower.

I use my cell phone as much as possible - texting customers and colleagues, answering messages and using Apps like Salesforce and Microsoft Teams to get work done. It’s critical to prioritize time at my desk. I schedule calls and projects around nap times and the occasional tablet and fruit snack combo bribe.

I am embracing the three P's: prioritize, pizza and paper plates. And there is always Tiger King on Netflix and wine after those hooligans are asleep.

Contributed by Suzy Joyce, Account Executive at Sun Chemical and founder of The Working Mamas of Indy blog (Two kids, ages 5 & 7 months)

*Photo by Katie Cochran at* *Chez Cochran Photography*

MAKE A PLAN

Nothing prepared any of us to live, work and operate in a world of forced telecommuting, homeschooling, and quarantine. A few lessons I have learned that make each day run as smoothly as it can:

Designate your office space in whatever manner fits your home and life. Make it a place that you can leave at the end of the day to create a sense of work being complete for the day.
Take breaks! Shut down the emails and silence the calls so that you can connect with your kiddos over a picnic lunch in the driveway or a quick game. We all take breaks when we are in our actual offices. Being at home shouldn’t be any different.
Create a weekly work plan. Each morning write out 2-3 tasks that you know you must get done before you go to bed that day. Other things will get attention too but having those 2-3 things written down will ensure that even when you get sidetracked with e-learning or crisis emails, you will not end your work day without getting to them.

Morgan Studer, Director of Faculty and Community Resources at IUPUI (Two kids, ages 8 & 5)

MAMA’S NEEDS

Working from home with my spouse and kids can feel like complete chaos. To be the best supervisor to my team and the best mom to my family, I knew I would need to translate some of my work-life structure to my work-from-home-life structure. Here’s what has been working well for me:

Mama needs her sleep: I still try to go to bed and wake up at the same time, no matter how enticing it might be to binge-watch the new season of Ozark on HBO. If I don’t get 7-8 hours of sleep, there’s no way I will be able to stay patient with my kids when working through an eLearning packet.

Mama needs to move: I typically work out on my lunch break, and I’ve kept that time sacred, even at home. Whether it’s Yoga with Adriene or walking laps in my driveway while listening to an audiobook on my Libby App, I block off an hour on my calendar so that my team will know that I am not available during that time.

*Photo by* *Zen Bear Yoga* on *Unsplash*

Mama needs to connect: Since I can’t walk down the hallway to chat with my team members, I’ve set up daily Zoom meetings as virtual “water cooler” chats. These are optional for people to attend and there is no set agenda.

Mama needs some quiet: I don’t have a home office, so I had to create one. I set up a TV tray as my desk in the corner of my bedroom. I face the window so I can feel the sunshine on my face. I turn on my Peaceful Piano playlist on Spotify to drown out the screaming coming from the other room.

Contributed by Julie Short, Associate Director of Data, Operations & Technology at Ball State University & Host of the Momnesia Podcast (Two kids, ages 10 & 7)

COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR WORK TEAM

Regular communication is necessary to ensure trust. The mode of communication changes with virtual workers, not the content. Frequent bite-sized information much like a cubicle drive-by is sufficient to maintaining open communication. A standing 15-minute daily huddle or kickoff to see what everyone's priorities are can help immensely. Everyone likes to communicate a bit differently - ask for their preferences and flex your communication style to support them.

Communication can be supported by technology. Technology tools like Asana and Slack provide venues for timely communications without inundating workers' email boxes. Ask the team how they prefer to communicate via technology and at what frequency. Set parameters for how the technology is to be leveraged (for feedback on deliverables or article sharing for example).

Contributed by Julie Kratz, CEO and Founder of Next Pivot Point (One kid, age 6)

WEAVE IN NORMALCY

Find a balance with your spouse for work and tradeoff for important meetings and tasks.

Get dressed every day and grab Chick-Fil-A to weave in some normalcy! Observe a quiet hour for those non-napping children with books or quiet activities in their room.

Get out and breathe fresh air every day. Take advantage of local walking trails (if available) or find an empty church parking lot for bike riding and walking.

Lastly, shift your expectations. This is unprecedented and you can’t do everything. Focus on your family and your health and the rest will be okay!

Contributed by Savannah Dupree, Cyber Security Lead at Humana (Three kids, ages 6, 4 & 7 months)

GRACE NOT PERFECTION

The last couple of weeks have been hard as I now work full time at home, help my first grader with school, and watch my rambunctious 4-year-old boy all while my husband still goes into work!

I came to realize that I need to give myself grace and not expect perfection. Don’t get me wrong, I want to do my job well, but it is ok if it isn’t perfect. The same with my children. I want to take care of them well, but it is ok if it isn’t perfect and it isn’t Pinterest worthy.

We need to give ourselves grace, lower our expectations of perfection, and remind ourselves we aren’t in this alone.

Contributed by Sarah Schermerhorn, 3rd grade teacher, Indianapolis (Two kids, ages 6 & 4)

SELF-CARE & HEADPHONES

Managing a full-time gig from home — with kids — takes it all out of you. The most important thing I do is to make time for myself, and I need to be intentional about it.

I schedule appointments for at-home exercise and meditation using Title Boxing On Demand, free weights, and the Guided Mind meditation app. I also keep up with my weekly therapy sessions via Zoom.

While working, I keep a variety of tools at my disposal. First, headphones: two Bluetooth, one wired. If I want to take calls while doing something else, like making lunch for the kids, bluetooth is necessary. A wired headset is always my backup.

*Photo by* *Christina @ wocintechchat.com* on *Unsplash*

On Zoom, I keep a mix of virtual backgrounds saved. You can find free photo backgrounds or videos on a loop on Pixabay. This help keeps people from seeing messes or chaos in my house — but I also I love changing them up, and using funny ones (like me in a bustling coffee house that definitely isn’t open now) because it makes people smile! And we all need some extra smiles right now.

Contributed by Mandy McIntyre, Content & Digital Media Director at Enterprise Community Partners (Two kids, ages 7 & 3)

SHARE THE LOAD (if you can!)

My husband and I are lucky to be able to work from home right now. However, with a 4-year-old's short attention span and a 7-year-old who is not yet an independent learner, our scheduling skills have been put to the test.

What we threw together features multicolored activity signs fastened by clothes pins to an old baby gate. The kids decide whether to do reading in the morning with Daddy or art in the afternoon with Mommy.

One morning my oldest put "rest time" immediately after breakfast, and I thought he was being ornery. But then I saw his tired eyes and felt how exhausted I was also. What a smart choice he made! The rest of the day ended up being productive and fun.

Since then, I've tried to be mindful of my self-care too, making my schedule each morning with my mental and physical needs in mind.

Contributed by Emily Rawlinson, Director of Grants and Special Projects at Indiana Historical Society (Two kids, ages 7 & 4)

One last thing…

No matter your best strategies and plans, one day you may feel like you are winning at life and the next, failing miserably.

Stay in community with friends and family with apps like Voxer and Marco Polo and Working Mom Facebook groups.

Rest.

Do activities that energize you (quarantine compliant of course).

And most of all, search for even the tiniest things you can be grateful for each day. There are new mercies every morning, my friend. We are in this together!

In The Trenches: Practical Tips for Working From Home With Kids